Las Madres '80 East


June 6-8
Los Padres Golf Weekend
Forest Meadows
Contact: Lou

June 21
Meeting & Coffee Field Trip
Crate & Barrel Outlet
Contact: Sally

June 26
Craft Night
7:15 pm
Contact: Kathy to VOLUNTEER

August 2-9

October 9-12
Pacific International Quilt Festival
Santa Clara Convention Center
Contact: Tina

October 17-19
Ladies Fall Weekend
Pitcher Cabin in Pollock Pines
Contact: Cindy

1st Ed Ryan
2nd Sally Brooks-Schulke
14th Jeffrey Caso (Happy 23rd!)
25th Kevin Ballard (Happy 20th!)
29th Andreas Tsafos
30th David Ryan (Happy 21st!)

June Meeting
When: June 21, TBA
Where: Crate & Barrel Outlet
What: Shopping for Bargins

Sally will lead us on an outing to the Crate & Barrel Outlet with a Cofee Field Trip on the way!

Graduations & School Plans
Abbey Nevoli is graduating from 6th grade at Cadwallader School.

Brett Nevoli has graduated from Evergreen College with an AA.

Leah D'Agosta has graduated from Humbolt State University with a B.A. in Liberal Studies for Elementary Education.

Sara Hennig has graduated from the University of Massachusetts in Boston as a R.N.

Trevor Wilson has graduated from Chico State University with a B.S. in Business.

Adam Gerlinger did the graduation "walk" but will actually graduate from Chico State University in December with a B.S. in Business.

Kindra Claverie finished her first year of teaching and received her Clear Credential.

Jenny Pitcher has been accepted to San Francisco State and will be moving into her apartment there in June or July. Her perserverance and hard work has paid off! Her mom and dad are so proud of her!

Adam Reid will be going to graduate school at ?

(Editor's Note: Please send any additions, corrections, or updates.)

Kid's Korner
Abbey Nevoli received the Bronze Award which is the highest achievement that can be attained by a Junior Girl Scout.

Denise Heinrichsen's cheerleading squad, the Long Beach Elite, took second place at the S.M.A.R.T. National Competition on May 17th.

Happy Anniversary
Wishing Marian & Bill Caso a Happy 10th Anniversary on the 26th!

Craft Night

Los Padres Golf News
Lou made golf dates at Forest Meadows. He reserved 2 houses for the week-end of June 6, 7 and 8, 2003. He already has some tee times for Forest Meadows, and the others have to be made closer to the date. Please call or e-mail Lou if you have any questions.

Saturday Coffee Clatches Continue
Meet your Las Madres friends for some coffee and conversation at the Starbuck's at White and Aborn on Saturday mornings at 9am. Every third Saturday is a field trip. This month we will be combining our field trip with out meeting as Sally leads us to the Crate & Barrel Outlet.


You know you're in California when...

1. Your co-worker has 8 body piercings and none are visible.

2. You make over $250,000.00 and still can't afford a house

3. You take a bus and are shocked at 2 people carrying on a conversation in English.

4. Your child's 3rd grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, and is named Breeze.

5. You can't pot illegal?

6. You've been to a baby shower that has two mothers and a sperm donor.

7. You've got a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are grown and can taste the difference between Sumatran and Ethiopian.

8. You know which restaurant serves the freshest arugula.

9. You can't pot illegal?

10. A really great parking space can move you to tears.

11. A low speed pursuit will interrupt ANY TV broadcast.

12. Gas cost 75 cents per gallon more than anywhere else in the U.S.

13. A man gets on the bus in full leather regalia and crotchless chaps.Y ou don't even notice.

14. Unlike backhome, the guy at 8:30 a.m. at Starbucks wearing the baseball hat and sunglasses who looks like George Clooney IS George Clooney.

15. Your car insurance cost as much as your house payment.

16. Your hairdresser is straight, your plumber is gay, and your Mary Kay rep. is in drag.

17. You can't pot illegal?

18. It's sprinkling and there's a report on every news station about "Storm Watch 2000".

19. You have to leave the big company meeting early because Billy Banks himself is teaching the 4:00 pm Tae Bo class.

20. You pass a elementary school playground and the children are all busy with their cell phones or pagers.

21. It's sprinkling outside and you leave early for work to avoid all the weather related accidents.

22. HEY!!!!! Is pot illegal?????

23. You and your dog both have therapists.

24. Over 85% of the cities, towns, and streets start with San, Los, El, La, Santa, De La, or De Los.

25. Two overcast days in a row drive you mad.

26. A family of four owns six vehicles.

27. Everyone who lives here knows that hurricanes, tornadoes, floods, and snowstorms are way worse than earthquakes, which are, after all, over almost as soon as you realize what's happening.

28. Even if the store is across the street, you drive there.

29. Yeah, you're sure . . . pot is legal.

30. And finally, a question: Q. How many Californians does it take to screw in a light bulb? A. None. Californians cannot afford to turn on the lights.


Dumb California Laws

Sunshine is guaranteed to the masses.
Animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern,school, or place of worship.
Bathhouses are against the law.
It is a misdemeanor to shoot at any kind of game from a moving vehicle,unless the target is a whale.
Women may not drive in a house coat.
No vehicle without a driver may exceed 60 miles per hour.
Many animals are illegal to own as pets, including snails, sloths, and elephants.
In an animal shelter, lizards and snakes are treated under the same guidelines as cats and dogs.

Peacocks have the right of way to cross any street, including driveways.

You cannot leave your car on the street overnight without the proper permit.

Baldwin Park
Nobody is allowed to ride a bicycle in a swimming pool.

City Council order reads: "No dog shall be in a public place without its master on a leash."

You are not permitted to wear cowboy boots unless you already own at least two cows.

It is illegal to spit, except on baseball diamonds.

Ice cream may not be eaten while standing on the sidewalk. (Repealed when Clint Eastwood was mayor)
Women may not wear high heels while in the city limits.

Detonating a nuclear device within the city limits results in a $500 fine.

It is illegal to wash your car in the street. (Passed 1995).

It is illegal to drive more than two thousand sheep down Hollywood Boulevard at one time.

You are forbidden to spit on the ground within 5 feet of another person.

It is illegal to own or sell "Silly String".

It is illegal to posses, own or raise roosters. This is considered disturbing the peace.

Long Beach
Cars are the only item allowed in a garage.
It is illegal to curse on a mini-golf course.

Los Angeles
It is illegal for a man to beat his wife with a strap wider than 2 inches without her consent.
You cannot bathe two babies in the same tub at the same time.
You may not hunt moths under a street light.
It is illegal to cry on the witness stand.
Toads may not be licked.
It is a crime for dogs to mate within 500 yards of a church. Breaking this law is punishable by a fine of $500 and/or six months in prison.
Zoot suits are prohibited.

Roosters may not crow in the city limits.

Pacific Grove
Molesting butterflies can result in a $500 fine.

Palm Springs
It is illegal to walk a camel down Palm Canyon Drive between the hours of four and six PM.

It is illegal for a secretary to be alone in a room with her boss.

Two bathtubs may not be installed in the same house.

Motor vehicles may not drive on city streets unless a man with a lantern is wallking ahead of it.

One may not carry a lunch down the street between 11 and 1 o'clock.

San Diego
It is illegal to shoot jackrabbits from the back of a streetcar.
The owners of houses with Christmas lights on them past February second may be fined up to $250.

San Francisco
Prohibits elephants from strolling down Market Street unless they are on a leash.
It is illegal to wipe one's car with used underwear.
Persons classified as "ugly" may not walk down any street.
It is illegal to pile horse manure more than six feet high on a street corner.

San Jose
It is illegal to have more than two cats or dogs. -Ord. 7.08.595

Santa Monica
You may not play percussion instruments on the beach.

Ducks have the right of way to cross Rancho California St. at all times.



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President - Kathy Roessler
Treasurer - Vicki Rasmussen
Newsletter & Webmaster - Ginny Gomez
Coffee Co-Coordinators - Robin Nevoli & Tina Cuneo
Executive Committee - Randi Heinrichsen, Joan Wilson and Sally Brooks-Schulke